Seeking Center: The Podcast

The HERstory of HIStory — What You Don’t Know - Episode 21

November 20, 2020 Robyn Miller Brecker / Karen Loenser / Marisa Acocella Season 1 Episode 21
Seeking Center: The Podcast
The HERstory of HIStory — What You Don’t Know - Episode 21
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Marisa Acocella is the New York Times best-selling author of her graphic memoir Cancer Vixen, among other best-selling books and is an iconic New York cartoonist. In her new book, The Big She-Bang, Marisa channels God the Mother in an epic retelling that begins with The Big She-Bang and the rest as they say is HERstory. 

Marisa is a gifted storyteller. She is brilliant, funny and does not hold back. Her seeker journey is fascinating, empowering and has a bit of magic sprinkled along the way. 

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You can also follow Seeking Center on Instagram at @seekingcenterrobyn

Have you ever wondered about life's biggest questions?  Like, why am I here?  What happens when we die?  Or what else is out there,  but we have, and we love to talk about it.  And if you're listening, we think you probably do too.  I'm Robyn and I'm Karen and we've spent our lives searching for those answers.

And we're seekers, just like you talking to some of the most fascinating spiritual teachers, healers and scientists. And showing you how you can use some of their spiritual practices for yourself.  Also be sharing stories of other seekers. They motivate you to live your fullest and we'll be translating it all.

So the spiritual stuff won't feel so out there. If you're curious, get ready to rediscover why we're here together.

Marisa Acocella is the New York times bestselling author of her graphic memoir cancer Vixen among other best-selling books. And as an iconic New York cartoonist. In her new book, The Big She-Bang, Marisa tunnels, God, the mother, and an Epic retelling that begins with the big bang and the rest, as they say is HERstory.

Marisa is storyteller. She is brilliant, funny, and does not hold back. Her secret journey is fascinating, empowering, and has a bit of magic sprinkled along the way. We're so interested in knowing your story because. Clearly you've had a path that you've followed and it's probably not been the easiest.

Yeah, no, it's really, it really hasn't, but I feel like I've always been shown the way and like the weirdest, most amazing, most magical ways from when I was in advertising, I had a Saturn return when I was 29 and I was journaling was new year's Eve. And I was like, thinking of writing down everything I wanted for the year.

And instead of doing that list, I drew myself as blonde bombshell, which was like a character I drawn ever since I was like three years old. Right. Literally my mom was a shoe designer and she would do these trend reports with like fabulous women wearing fabulous shoes. She actually designed shoes for Jackie Kennedy when she was a first lady, she, my mother designed her shoe for the inauguration for JFK's inauguration.

Right. So basically I would just imitate my mother drawing these. Fabulous women. And I drew myself when I was 29 on new year's Eve in my journal with a gun in my mouth, right. Saying she was a little upset during the meeting. Cause I basically was like hated advertising so very much. And that was my lightning bolt moment.

And I basically saw my whole career in a flash. I wrote my mother was a smother. I, I literally wrote the first comic strip that I ever did, which appeared in Mirabella the nine 30 next year, actually the January issue of Mirabella and that's how I became a cartoonist and left advertising. Wow. God. We'll talk about following your in, by getting a download.

And that was the download. I literally asked universe. Oh, actually, here's the crazy other part of that story. So before I did that, I lit a candle and I asked every single spirit I can think of. Right. I asked all the saints in heaven, the Virgin, Mary God, God, the mother Jesus. When I actually had that epiphany moment and I saw everything in a flash, I was so startled.

I have very long hair at that point. I leaned into the candle and my hair caught fire. So I had my life's purpose and then I had to get a shag. Wow. So that's, that's how I went on the cartoonist journey right then and there, like talk to me about that. Going back to when you were young. Can you tell us a little bit about growing up and having that gift and using that gift when you were that young I'm drawing?

Well, I mean, my mom, as I said, she was a shoe designer and after she gave birth to me after the big phone call, when Jackie called her, when she was the head designer at Delmon okay. The phone call went like this, this is kind of funny. Hello? Can I speak to the designer? My mother and her Jersey and said, I'm the designer.

She said, this is Jackie, Jackie Kennedy. And my mother's like, Oh my God, you're kidding said, no, it's really me. I have a size 11 shoe and I can't find anything to wear for my husband's a mercury. Okay. So my mother says, well, I'm a size 11, I'm weak. I commiserate. So literally that's how my mother wound up designing Jackie's shoe.

And at the time Jackie was pregnant with JFK jr. And my mom was pregnant with me. So then my mom left for office and was working from home freelancing and there was literally, and she would do these trend reports and draw these women wearing her shoes. And I would literally imitate her. And by the time I would say I was actually completely, totally bored with them because they were not talking to me and I need to have like a dialogue.

So we went on this vacation and my dad decided, okay, he's going to splurge and take us to Remuda. We go to this house. On the fringe of this resort in this pink elephant of a house. And it's got these drawings with captions on them. And I was like, wow, I never thought about this. But the women that I'm drawing can actually speak turns out it was James Thurbers house.

So I literally like devoured every single book that was in the house. There Bruce Kahn, carnival the white deer, all these old new Yorkers. And that's how I started actually having these women who would actually start talking. And then I forgot about it. Once a Pratt went into advertising, then have that epiphany moment when I had my Saturn return on new year's Eve.

That's my story. What was the inspiration for the biggest humane after had that epiphany and did the cartoon? She was a little upset during the meaning I was working in advertising and I. During the day. And at night I was developing my comic strip called shape. And it was really funny because everybody thought I was taking copious notes in meetings, but I was just actually sketching out ideas for the comic strip.

And not only that, but there I am. I was like nodding out in meetings too. And everybody thought, I mean, I must've looked like a junkie because I was basically up until four o'clock in the morning and getting up at like seven, you know, getting two or three hours. That whole year developing this comic strip.

And then while I was working on Shay, I had this idea called The Big She-Bang and I was also studying goddesses. I had this idea, but, and I thought it would be like a big book about Xi and about goddesses. And I really didn't know how to develop it at that point. And I always thought, well, God has to be a woman when I wrote.

My book cancer VIX, and I had God as a woman and it never made sense to me that a man gave birth to everything. And then I did that research and the female entity of God was edited out of the Bible at the council of Nicea in three 25, by Constantine that. Son of a bitch, excuse me, Roman emperor. And you know, they basically edit everything out.

There were female priests. There was God, the mother, she was cut out. There were all these great saints that were cut out with great stories. Like Beckla who was a Saint who basically was thrown to the lions and baptized herself. She's got the most amazing story. Her mother threw her under the bus. Had her thrown to the lions because she wouldn't marry like this guy and wanted to go out with st.

Paul. I mean, there are so many great stories about all these great women that were edited out of the Bible. I started researching that and became enthralled with these stories and wrote The Big She-Bang like two years ago. But it's like, it's, it seems to me that you've had this, I've had this story and I've been developing it decades for decades.

I actually spent two years by myself with these goddesses writing The Big She-Bang. I didn't date anybody because I was literally taking these books and my notepads to bed. And these goddesses are very territorial and divas and they needed my attention. Full on all the time. And I was obsessed with Mary Magdalen.

I love Mary Magdalen. HERstory is so amazing to me because did she, for instance, did you know that Mary Magdalene was a princess? Literally her father was one of the Kings of the 12 tribes of Israel. No, I didn't. It was a prostitute. Well, this is what happened. She, Mary Magdalene, right? Her mother was visited by Gabriel, the, or angel.

It's just like the Virgin Mary was, but Mary Magdalene's mother didn't have ears that can hear and eyes that could see. So she couldn't see. It's like she couldn't see through the veil was covering everything up. So when she gave birth to Mary Magdalene, suddenly she could see Gabriel and she realized that she had a special daughter.

But her husband, the King one, and none of the daughter wanted to have a son who would be the heir. Okay. So Mary, his mother sensor off to school in Egypt, Mary comes back and she's a beauty and she is enlightened. And her father. Sent her off to Babylon when she was 16 and a caravan with her amaze and her drivers and her dowery and the road to Babylon is really, really dangerous.

Right. And she was supposed to marry the richest man in Babylon. And what happened was. The mates were killed, the driver was killed and Mary was then sex trafficked and sold into prostitution. So that was HERstory. She made enough money to free herself and free the women. And then she went back and she met Jesus and that's the story.

And it was like this incredible story of redemption and just basically discovering her path and who she really is. Mary Magdalen was born to be the great liberator and she was born to save herself. And that is a lesson here and she and Jesus were this incredible power couple because they were both saviors.

They were the divine male and the divine female. And it's through that. Love that. I think that we could learn the lesson of love, of spirit, love of humanity and balance balancing the male, balancing the female. I mean, they were like the original power couple, but besides God, the mother and God, the father, and if you take mother earth, Right.

What is earth? Really the word earth. What's that an anagram for heart? I feel like what we're supposed to focus on now is love. And the sheep, Ellucian, the divine feminine must rise and balance, and humanity must rise. And if we want to save the earth and we want to save humanity, that's what we've got to do as a species.

I think that, you know, if you take the originals. The story of Adam and Eve, Adam was basically, let's say he was a piece of clay, right. And this whole myth about Eve coming out of his rib. I mean, that's ludicrous, right? That, I mean, how could that possibly be? That makes us subserving in a piece of man when we are our own entities and the whole backstory of Eve is.

I think totally wrong. Just like everything else. All of our history. I think it's been inverted. You like read what came out of nag. Hammadi in 1947, which I call divine feminine intervention. Like mother earth showed us the way those. Codices were buried in Egypt and they were discovered in a red urn and they were unleashed into the world.

And those stories, the story about Eve and the story of humanity, we don't even really even know. I think our real history, I mean, there is one story, like we all know that God's only son is Jesus, right? The design side. Well, what about the divine daughter? Was there one. Right. There was that's Sophia. Yeah.

Sophia is the number one most suppressed story and the history and her history of humanity. I wear Sophia bracelet. Okay. So, so I mean, so I did, but like most people don't. No. I don't know that story. I love

the book, right? Yeah. Wait. Okay. Sophia. So God, the mother, right? She gives birth to God. The father, as I see it, godfather was the first Virgin birth he had to come from somewhere. Then, you know, God, the mother and God, the father are the original power couple. So then God, the mother gives birth to the ans the angels and she gives birth to the city.

So divine. And the divine daughter, the divine daughter is Sophia. Right. Beautiful. Okay. So Sophia and Christos, her trend flame, they're tasked with creating the human genome, the anthropos, the divine spark, the blueprint for humanity. But because Sophia is her mother's daughter. She has a spark of creativity in her.

She has this need to know, and she had this creative impulse. So she wanted to go and create on her own. What happened was there, there's a law of creation and that is a law of balance. There needs to be a male and female entity. So Fe bypass that law and basically took off on her own and left the pleura Roma, which is really heaven.

Which is where God, the father and God, the mother and Christos and all the angels live. And because she was so creative to think basically is to conceive. And because she was so creative, her conception, wasn't just mental. It was physical. So her fierce gave birth to the G-Man or the demigod yelled about.

So here she is. Wow. She's terrified that she left the pleura MoMA. She defied God. She defied the law of creation and she gave birth to this demigod. So the Demi God wants to control Sophia. Sophia wants to hide, yell to Beth, and then she conspires with God. The mother, they get yelled about to create this man, this blueprint.

Which was Adam right out of clay and yelled about buzz because he wasn't a spirit. And because he had no soul tries to blow a spirit into Adam, but that doesn't work because he doesn't have any spirit. So then Sophia calls down to her mother and says, mom, send down the divine spark, right? There's mom sending the divine spark and there's.

Gov and mother sending down the divine spark and here is the divine spark right here, which is a drop. It creates the anthropos, which creates the woman, which creates Eve and Eve was enlightened. So Eva had the soul, you've had the soul, you have the soul even breathe life into Adam. Wow. Position. She was the mother of the living.

Eve because of her spark of light has given Adam birth. Yes. Here's what happened. Right? Eve was so powerful. Yelled about was so threatened by Eve that he basically devised for the divide and conquer humanity master plan. And he said like, they're going to implant a false memory in Adam and we're going to just stay, you know, let Eve came out of Adam's ribs.

So like Eva subservient and like that's where that came from. It was the power and the power couple. Wow. Oh my goodness. It was coming from, I mean, this is like, is this research, is this intuitive in you? Is this, where did this whole story come from? Cause it makes perfect sense, but I've never heard it. It comes from, the NAC many stories and also.

I kind of did a lot of research and put a lot of it together myself and also sort of let Eve speak to me. I felt like I was her channel. I mean, Eve was supernatural. She has to have the ability when they come after her, they, and they did come after her. She had the ability to blind them. Done them. And then her spirit left, her body went into the tree of knowledge and chris' spirit was in the tree.

The Arcons came after Eve's body. They attacked her, which is a me too moment if there ever was one Eve's body was in this tree. And so to reignite her enlightenment Eve that the snake who was really wisdom and the divine. Feminine, who was also in the tree, who was also Eve told Eve to eat the Apple because the Apple was the defined feminine because each spiritless in the Apple.

So basically Eve the snake, which, who is Eve gave advice to Eve herself to eat from the tree, which was Eve and Eve was the fruit. So he basically took a bite out of herself. To re input to put yourself back into her body. And then when she was whole, again, woke up Adam because Adam fell asleep, adding the sleeping handsome, he was the original sleeping beauty and took a bite out of Adam Eve out of the divine, feminine and woke up.

And then they realized they were in Eden in prison because Ian was really a prison. They weren't. Laid by alphabet. And that's how they escaped prison and left Eden because in the Bible they were banished, right? Because they ate from the tree of knowledge and that was taboo. They weren't supposed to do that.

So we flipped story it's inverted. It is totally inverted. Our history is completely inverted. It was a choice to leave Aiden. It was a prison and that was Eve's choice. Eva's a great evolutionary. It's amazing that the number one scapegoat of humanity is really its hero. Wow. Wow. Yeah. And then there's yells about who says, you know, woman, you will give birth in pain and she says, Oh yeah.

Well, this was for my daughters and their daughters onto infinity. And what happens is. She breathes fire and out of the fire becomes an Avenger angel and she sends yells about to hell, which, you know, obviously it didn't just stay there because, well, it's still the big, bad, yes. That is fear. Right.

Symbolizes. Fear. And that is, can I just ask one more question about this? Cause now I'm fascinated. Did you take it any further to Canada? I did actually go to cannon Abel because her pulled her in. Right. I take it from Eve to Eve's daughter. Did you know? You've had a daughter? Wow. Okay. Eve had a daughter and her name is.

No, Maria Adam, he needs daughter and Maria came after Cain and Abel. So Kane because he wasn't really, son because of the attack that spotty sustained when her spirit left her body and that she was attacked when she, her spirit was in the tree, Cain had. Seven fathers. And because the Arcons themselves for like these slithery draconian animal headed freaks, basically, you know, ritually and freaks.

So there's cane, if you can see them right here and he was bareheaded and his whole line, they are all animal headed part humans. Yeah. That was the first bloodline of humanity. The second bloodline was. Sired by, by Seth Wright who was also enlightened, just like Maria. There was a third bloodline sired by the Watchers or the ALO Ham's sons of guns who took the daughters of man for their wise.

They produced an unholy Alliance that spawned a Neff alum, you know, about the giants, you know, like whole giant. Yep. So that's, that was a real, it's how you're bringing this to life. I know part of the men's stories, but yeah, I mean, one of the reasons why they say that the arc was created, but Maria, who is his daughter was actually married to.

But the thing is like Noah was also a hybrid. I mean, Noah, wasn't such a great guy, because when you think about it, like he creates this arc to basically get rid of humanity, basically Nuri as mentioned in the Bible. Right. But not by name, she's a named and she's mentioned five times. And why is she mentioned five times?

Because a, her name actually means beautiful fire Nuria. She actually tried to stay humanity, not once, not twice, but three times, because like, no, it was building this Ark. And what Nuria was doing was she was trying to take it down. Like she burned the art down three times with her powerful. Voice of fire to breathe fire.

She tried to save humanity. Wow. Just even listening. It changes everything. It changes everything. I mean, our history is totally inverted. We live in a dark is light lightest, dark bad hides behind. Good, good as mistaken for bad. Upside down world of inversion, but we can turn the world around love and the Shiva solution.

It wants the divine feminine rises. We've balanced humanity and take it on as humanity goes. So goes mother earth and as mother earth goes, so goes humanity. We are, our futures are intertwined at this point in time, humanity is going to make a choice, which way are we going to go? That's basically what starts the book off anyway.

It's mother earth eating with God, the mother. So get humanity on the right path. Well, and it makes sense why that seed of an idea that you had in the early nineties is now coming to full fruition, even though you've had this incredibly successful career, both as a bestselling author, as a cartoonist, as someone standing up for women's rights and people who have had cancer.

But here you are now with this book that you thought of when you were 29 and it's now coming to fruition because we need it more than ever. I feel like in a way I'm just a conduit for these stories. I just, every morning, I just. Ask God, the mother and all the same. So I still talk to them and channel them every morning.

And I just ask them to guide me and help me and help me write the story and keep me on the righteous path. I am just like stacking the deck in my favor and asking every single Saint I could think of. And your PO, so actually something crazy happened. And that was one morning I had finished about half.

So half the book I had done all half the artwork and I woke up with a voice in my head that said, Marisa backup your computer. It's urgent. And I never did back anything up. And it was like, Marisa backup your computer. It's urgent. I had a friend, I was taking animation classes and I had my friend Thomas.

Who's like an animation instructor. I'm like, Thomas, this is kind of crazy. Can you like, I've never backed anything up, but can you do it for me? Like right now, before we start class, he was like, yeah, sure. So literally the next day. Stay, I start my computer and it goes on for a split second and then nothing.

I ran it over to Apple. Guess what happened? They couldn't, it started and then died. And then they took it and it never ever, ever, ever started again. So I know that, but you went back to it up. I backed it up, but if I didn't, I would have lost a full year's worth of art work. I never would have made my book deadline.

I mean, it would have definitely been a setback and that's an understatement. Right. So that happened. Oh, and then I have this one goddess. Her name is Nana. And Nana was a Babylonian Sumerian goddess, and she was so powerful. She was the goddess of goddesses. Okay. And I was like, why aren't you doing that?

Why didn't anybody ever hear her? And I was like trying to write her in a way that made sense, because there were so many different storylines. She had her own temple Yana, and she had goddesses. And then she had this ritual where like the goddess would take the King and it was like, But women were in control and they were in power.

And I was like, wow, this is so cool. I just started researching her a little bit further. And my birthday's on Christmas, right. It just turned Christmas. Right. It was December 25th. I'm doing a little research and I discovered that their fertility ritual, like the taking an honest place. So they basically killed the man.

Oh my God. This is on Chrysalis. I'm reading this. The man is killed kind of crazy. They sacrificed a man. Then the goddess gave birth to a baby. When it's a baby born, the baby is born on Christmas. I'm writing this on Christmas and baby's born on Christmas. Christmas is my birthday. And then the baby's slaughtered.

Spring. So it's a double, double killing and I'm like, Oh my God, this is a reason why I had such a hard time with and Nona and I had to go back and rewrite the whole thing. And I was literally shaken by the shaking of the core by this. Right. So here I am running this book about goddesses and like that happens.

It was just nuts. That was a gift from God. Yeah. I was going to say for attracting it, you know, I, I so want to know what your past life. You know, and I thought, okay, well, I think I was one of those babies who was sacrificed. That's what I smelled. I feel that on a cellular level. And I mean, I know one of my guides is Saint Michael, the Archangel, you know, I've got, Oh, those are scapulars.

I have not seen a scapular. I wear them everyday. Wow. Well, that's why they feel close to you, but I can see the way you light up when you tell these stories is unbelievable. It's like, you're, you're channeling it, but you also know it as your truth, which is what is so exciting. But I also love how you kind of put it in almost like a perspective of a superhero, really big and strong and powerful.

She was literally, they say that she was like nine or 10 feet tall. Our bodies then were more light. They were not as dense. The more we sunk into matter, the denser we got. I mean, how's that for like a metaphor, right? That makes sense. Yeah. They say that they have real grade somewhere in the middle East.

Really. Okay. I'll help dig

please, please find it really well. And I feel like Marisa, that you. Should be teaching this in addition to the, I mean, that's what you're doing with your book. You shouldn't be doing a series on all of this and the passion and inspiration, because look at me, both of us, the questions that come out of this story, like people are going to walk away after reading this book wanting more, as you were talking, like when you wrote this book, were you writing it for yourself?

Were you writing it? For others. I feel like I just wanted to reach the soul of humanity. Honestly. I just wanted to speak to our truth. And I just, I think it's really mother earth. I feel that I do because she's really in danger. And so are we, and you know what the problem is. I feel like we have been our stories and we have, some people have been so suppressed and so maligned and sidelined, especially women.

I mean, we're 51% of the population. There has been systemic sexism since day one. Right? Let's talk about that. God, the father had to come from someplace. He was the first Virgin birth. Let's get real about this. Because we were so powerful. What does, what does the opposing team do? Take down the strongest player, right?

It happens in baseball, happens in football. I'm going to use like a guy metaphor to get through because a lot of people can hear it. If it's like a chick thing, you take down the strongest person and then everybody else falls because they were like, Oh my God, The strongest person fell now, what are we going to do?

How will we defend ourselves? Well, you know what? God, the mother was all powerful. She gave birth to the universe. Eve gave Adam life, right? She was a physician. So what do they do? They take her down. So, you know what? It's time we rise up the divine feminine must rise and we must bring up the divine. Now that's why Jesus and Mary Magdalene are such a great metaphor because they're.

They're like the power couple that it's about balance and it's not just a male female thing. It's like, we all have male, female inside us. I'm not talking like gender, I'm talking balance who we are. Okay. Because when you balance the tantric snakes, you know what I'm talking about, right. It's a male female thing that's inside all of us.

So that's what I mean. I'm so glad you said that because I think a lot of people, when they hear divine, feminine, divine, masculine, they do really just go to gender. We're not talking about not talking gender. Billy needs to understand that here illustrate my point. Here's Mary Magdalene and Jesus, right, Mary, by the way, you know what.

Mary Magdalene was smoking hot and about her. She was a smoking hot redhead. Oh wow. There she is. Stunning. That's really the bracelet she actually wore. And you know how I had validation on that. I was like always gone to the metropolitan museum, found that bracelet on Egyptians for conferences. And yeah, that was like, I read that she had that bracelet and then I actually.

Found it that's the bracelet. That's so cool. It goes back to the Eve story, right? Like it goes back to the story, it's all connected. Right. And like, that's the other thing you think the snake is a villain? Well, the snake in the garden of Eden was wisdom. She was, it was Eve. I mean, Sophia was the wisdom goddess.

I wear ISIS and I wear Sophia. Those are the biases in here too, by the way. Do you know that Mary Magdalen went to the school of ISIS? No. I didn't know that there was a school. Seriously. Mary Magdalen. She had a mystery school. So the ISIS mysteries full, and it was the divine feminine magic of ISIS and Mary Magdalen went to her mystery school and got her mystery school tools.

And that was the raising of the Kundalini snake. I mean, Mary Magdalene was like the prize student and she mastered the racing of the Columbia ladies. Very young age. We've talked before about Jesus, right. Being schooled by the assignor, like going off into the desert, like when he was 12, we went to the male version of the mystery school.

He went to the safe, I didn't know. There was a like again. Yeah, because again, we live in an inverted world. We live in a world. Yeah. And I think what you said about humanity. Like this is to help save humanity. We have, like, I was talking to my husband this morning. He's been, you know, from a political perspective, going back and forth with certain friends and pine to have dialogue.

And what, at the end of the day, no matter what you think politically, you need to remember that we're all human. We are all human. And I still like, okay. The divide and conquer humanity master plan started with Eve because she was so powerful. So they had to take her down. Then it's like black versus white.

Then I divide us in terms of religion, you know? Jewish versus Catholic versus Muslim. I mean, they divide us every single way they can. And I feel like that's like, and now it's like Democrat versus Republican. Wow. This is such an incredible story. And it's like, I want to know more. I feel like you've just, there's so much more to learn from you.

And I think there's so much more to learn together and I agree. Well, and one other question too. I know when we talked like you do incorporate astrology and crystals and intuitive type readings into your life, when did that happen? Has that always been something that's been, I know we talked about that moment when you were 29, but had you kind of been into any of that prior or was it all after the fact?

You know what, honestly, I can go back to when I was maybe about six years old. I remember my mother was going to have a hysterectomy and I was living in Roselle park in Jersey and going to school. And I remember like turning around and waving to my mother. Right. Because she was gone. It was a day of her hysterectomy.

And I saw her behind the screen door and I was like, my mother, my mother going to die. Right. It was like something terrible is going to happen to her. I dunno, I'm getting so much. It's like, I'm telling you it's all about the mother that day. It came back. My mother was in surgery. My grandmother was taking care of me and, and I just remember sitting on the steps and bursting into tears with my grandmother and being told that my mother almost died right on the operating table.

They cut like some kind of. Something like an artery. And my father was crying. My grandfather was crying. My mother did die on the opera. Like she did die. And luckily the doctors came back. But the anesthesiologist, because he felt that something was wrong. Cause my mother's pulse was too low, saved my mind.

but I knew it. I knew it. And I felt like from that point on, like I always been able to read things I could always tell when something's going to happen. And my mother basically she did have that near death. Experience. And she did go to the light and she had all that. So my mother likes to see spirits all the time.

I sensed them. Like I see things in a flash. Like I have a Tiffany she's, right. Like I did one, right? Yeah. By my mom. They literally like I get bail is just, the bail is not like, she just can see that like something that I, Karen and I talk about. Often is that we have these moments, these exit points. Right, right.

And that really was an exit point and you don't have to take it. And your mom clearly had a lot more to do. My mother kept saying the names of all of her children and it was not her time. So she came back into her body with extreme pain, but she had like this world vision and saw everything. She saw me.

Grandmother. She saw the doctor, right? Her soul came out, her soul, her soul came out of her body. She was at the light and she was like, no, it is not my time. That's so fascinating that she, I thought like nobody would ever understand this. But, you know, now it seems like there is a shift in humanity. Yes. So which way do you think you met and he's going to go?

I believe love, always wins over fear and I have deep faith, but that faith is challenged right now. Every single day, I believe in the light. So I believe we, we will get it right, but we are the light workers. So we have to band together, use the different skill sets and powers that we all, I really feel that really strongly.

I do. Yeah. I really feel like that's what we're here for, because this is like the greatest moment in the history of the planet right here. Right now this very bad. And I think we chose to be here right now and have our journeys be what they've been so that we could do we need to do now right now.

Exactly. I feel, I like, you know what? I have chills. I know that's validation. I totally feel this a hundred percent. I think it's because we've been able to have all of our separate journeys, the things that we have done, the, the pain that we've all been through that has opened us up to being willing to tell our stories.

I think for you Marisa with your cancer diagnosis however many years ago, and being real about telling your story, then that opened you up to be like, Oh, I can be real. So then it. Made this moment possible. Then you could take that seed of an idea that you're kind of like, I don't know how I'm going to tell the story and how people will receive it, but it was like all of those other experiences showed you that being true to who you are and telling what your soul is.

Asking you to tell it, changing humanity? I hope so. I really hope I fulfill my purpose here. I mean, I feel like this is what I'm meant to be doing and I hope I do it right. And I hope I do. And I hope I don't like going to the mother down cause that would really crush me, honestly. I mean, there's no way that you are.

Honestly, I mean, either way you bring it to light, it's so beautiful because you're giving it the illustration. You're bringing it into the, now you're telling an ancient, ancient story, but you're using illustration that everybody's going to be able to understand it. And even like the word history. Yes. I mean like, yes, it's, it's hers.

It's HERstory. Right, right. But I really think it's like, HERstory needs to be heard, but our story is human. So it's history and her history, but like, you know, there's been enough history. So like, you know what? You guys sit down and let us do the talking for a change. Thank you for pointing that out. But he used that term every day.

How do we not underscore like that? I know we right now that we're talking about proofs, I did the story in the book about Hypatia now Hypatia was the world's greatest mathematician shoe woman, like hello, like, Oh, I'm Barbie. I can't do math kind of thing. Like, which is what we were taught growing up, which is so ridiculous.

Right. So Hypatia like, 415 a day lived in Alexandria. She was a genius. She was like the world's greatest astronomer world's greatest mathematician. She was a philosopher. She taught that we were, we all come from this same divine spark. We are all one humanity. It's all wisely. We come from.

when that happens a lot, a girl and 400 Ady yes. Right. From an education. There was also from the school of philosophy in Alexandria and they have like the great library of Alexandria. Do you know what happened to the library? They say they burned it down. There was a big fire or the books actually all gone.

I bet they're not well, okay. Here's another thing. Thing. I actually did a research on this. And I have Hypatia come back at the end of the book with the Virgin Mary and gov mother. And they say that the missing books to the books that were burned in the library of Alexandria, did you know that the Vatican has a library knew you were going to say that may be just maybe rolling my eyes, right?

Maybe those books during the Vatican library under lock and key, if such chills, there's a ton in there. Our real history. History has been inserted. We are the anthropos and clothes and flesh and blood, but we are God's children. We're all. God's God, the mother and God, the father's children, that's who we are.

And we haven't even begun to realize. How powerful we are. And that's what I think 2020 is about. We're going to get our own divine with vision and wisdom, finding our vocabulary from now on. Even for me like talking about God, I'll be like, God, the mother and God, the father, right. So good. I'm not putting men down because I'm all about balance.

My husband is he's a balanced dude. Like he's, that's awesome. Does he have any brothers and only child? I mean, mothers are teaching their sons differently. I really do. I think this new generation that's coming through is I think they're going to be before stiff too. I hope so. I hope, I think we need to be a part of that education.

Really. I think we're humanity is either going to evolve or not. Pray that we do, but I don't. My money is on us. Me too, a hundred percent, but doesn't it seem like this is really true. We are full and know so many fierce women. We are sparks of God and we know, and to have like that, to look back to that kind of power from God, the mother.

From Eve, it makes much more sense for where our will comes from. I agree, God, the mother was really powerful. Why else would she be sidelined? I'm like super interested in like looking for the book, looking for, could be fine to eat. I mean, I'm going to find out. And so it's that idea of like howling, right?

The telling of the story in your beautiful and creative genius really and telling it, I can't wait to continue talking. So I know. All right. This was so much fun. Yeah. Wait to see where this goes. It's it's going to be great. Can we go so far? I'm going to send your book to a bunch of my friends, so let's definitely stay in touch for sure.

Well, we will. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. This is a really so much fun. Thank you. Bye bye. You can buy The Big She-Bang at and you can find more about 
Marisa Acocella at

The HERstory of HIStory — What You Don’t Know